Thursday, January 16, 2003

"bizzare search term that led someone here"-of-the-day:

vietnamese like tall guys

Wednesday, January 15, 2003

why is it that every time i think about writing fiction the first image that creeps in my head is someone crouched underneath a tree like those hobbits in fellowship with bombs dropping in the distance?

web sites whose probable non-existence makes me sure the full promise of the internet has not yet been fullfilled:

www.gaypeopletolerateus.com
www.emotionariel.com (sharon or little mermaid)
www.ratemyratemyrackstylewebsite.com

and a somewhat private note that I can't put on someone else's blog because she doesn't have a commenting thing: in reverse order:
3) I know. you got a problem with that?
2) yes, in an existential way. but to continue the metaphor the funny sentences are actually broken down into component words and letters and either pissed out (metaphorically, of course) or recycled into new funny sentences. but they lose any chance to grow into anything greater in the fertile, nutrient-ritch ovum of your commenting system.
1) i was too late for yaccs as well. i sucked it up and went with enetation but there's something called kilinkfamily which is new and a bunch of others and that's not really any excuse now is it? feel free to respond in the comments thing, babe. that's what it's for.

Tuesday, January 14, 2003

search terms that have led people here:
girls like mohawks shirt
skinhead chelsea haircut pics
punks mohawks pictures
faux hawk
pictures of girls with mohawks
girl mohawks

the moral: dudes dig chicks with mohawks.

also, i'm really happy that somewhere out there somebody just typed 'faux hawk' into google.
things i have learned since getting a counter on my page 2 days ago:
-i'm getting 100 hits or so a day. deck.
-there is a message board called Lets Talk About Hair (aka LTAH)
-they're talking about free mohawks
-9 hits from cincinnati, 2 from uk, 1 each from netherlands, austria, and finland
-it should be noted random house is in the house. shout outs to nyc.
-the banner ad is working.
-free copy of paint louis 98 or, eventually, the recoys record, to the first person who figures out where on the internet the banner ad is.
-people i have already told are not elligible.

edit to add- i have also learned i am a complete fucking dork, but somewhere in the back if my head i already knew that one.
welcome to all the newly linked. it is a pleasure to have you. coming in may, if you don't know by now:
The Recoys: Rekoys, 8 songs from the now defunct band featuring members of the walkmen and the french kicks. this includes 3 songs from their first EP and 5 never-released songs from what would have been their first full length, That Girl's a Decoy. this'll be a joint release by troubleman unlimited and realistic records (myself and my friend max). I'll have the label logo up in a day or so for you to critique. available in stores everywhere, or from this and other web sites.

speaking of which, why has no one bought paint louis yet? e-commerce, baby. is it too pricey? do you already have it? do you not know what the fuck it is? do you not know that I'll send you weird stuff i have in my house for ordering it?!?

come on kids, show off your haircuts!

Monday, January 13, 2003

/click\
TV VO: Even Terrorists Love Raymond is brought to you by NIOC, the New Iraqi Oil Concern, and Dubyabrau. We'll be back after this.

fade to black.

fade in to a pregnant arab woman in western dress walking with her mid-thirties husband on hollywood boulevard, passing by Mann's Chinese theater, taking pictures of the star's handprints and smiling wide-eyed at the mock glamour of it all. a black car obscures them in the frame. we can see the seal of the new homeland security dept. on the side of the vehicle. two strapping young men get out of the car, wearing khaki uniforms with red, white and blue armbands. they have dark cop sunglasses on. they approach the couple.

HSD officer 1 (affected german accent): paypahhz?! let me see your paypahhz!
man (reaching into his pocket, no accent whatsoever): excuse me?
HSD 2 (poking pregnant wife's belly, manhandling her breasts): johann, i think she hahs a bowmb heyahh.
man (red-faced, furious, makes a move toward HSD 2): who the fu-
HSD 1 holds back man, who continues struggling. HSD 1 knocks him cold with an elbow as HSD 2 starts removing the woman's shirt to get a look at her belly. she is crying uncontrolably.
HSD 1 (looking down at man): do naht rezist uhhs

Quick vertical wipe to black screen, accompanied by /wooooshthump\. Yellow letters & voiceover: SECURITY.
Horizontal wipe, /wooooshthump\. a cold can of Dubyabrau.
Vertical wipe, /wooooshthump\. Yellow letters & voiceover: BEER.
VO: Dubyabrau. Creepy fucking Nazi for "beer"
fade to black.
VO: and now back to Even Terrorists Love Raymond
\click/

Sunday, January 12, 2003

speaking of selling out, you can now buy a copy of paint louis 98, an emmy-winning graffiti documentary i made with some friends, with a credit card or paypal, by clicking on the left. bling.
congrats to the walkmen for getting "we've been had" placed in a saturn ad. i was over at their message board, and this guy thought it wrong to sell their tune to a car company:
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Name: Andy
E-mail address: nine_inch_andy@hotmail.com
Comments: I gotta be honest. I've been a pretty big advocate of The Walkmen for close to a year now but yesterday as I was sitting at the computer, I heard a familiar piano lick coming from the TV in the other room. My friend and I damn near knocked over our chairs scrambling to the television. "We've Been Had" on a goddamned car commercial!? I'm not one of those elitist music fans who turns their back on a band once they make it big and there's nothing wrong with wanting exposure so as to get your music out to people... but car commercials? If only the band knew how much their music means to some people, I doubt they'd sell it off to some evil corporation. What was it? The money? Exposure? Free cars? I'm still a fan but I know some friends of mine, who, as a result of this, aren't.Monday, January 13th 2003 - 06:05:18 AM
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and i disagreed. my response ended up being long, with pretty good grammar, so i figured I'd post it here, too:
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'corporate is the new indie'

do you ever buy major label music? the majors right now are all, for the most part bits of large evil multinationals and you're payin their bills. do you ever listen to the radio anywhere on the dial to the right of say 92 FM? clear channel owns all those radio stations, for the most part, and they are not really a mom and pop either. mtv is a tentacle of viacom, every band on there is making money for a evil capitalist behemoth.

tv commercials are one of the few avenues left these days available to artists that are trying to operate independently and still have their music heard by as many people as possible. radio and mtv are on lockdown by the majors through the payola system that's been coming to light in the past year or two and other kickbacks and favors between stations and labels. getting a song placed in a commercial, on the other hand, allows a band to get paid for their music, as opposed to paying for promotion, and in the long run will give them more freedom to operate independently of the evil corporations you're talking about. they get the exposure reserved in today's system for major label artists without signing some shitty contract that will leave them broke and forgotten if they sell less than a million copies. they get a nice chunk of change to keep them from needing to sign aforementioned shitty contract. this commercial just might help them remain independent and avoid major label pressure to change the music you hold so dear in search of a pop hit.

i understand the concern, as a listener, about keeping control of the context in which you experience a particular piece of art, and the duty you feel an artist has to protect that context for you. this is not something I am trying to brush aside, but i think that this saturn commercial is, if you don't like it, no worse than a video that you don't particularly dig. protect the context yourself if it is that important to you. close your eyes and cover your ears.

i think it's actually kind of a cool commercial: kinda clever, used the song well, actually communicates to a degree with the lyrics of the song (especially the ones that aren't used in the spot, interestingly enough). it doesn't ruin the song for me.

as a totally unrelated sidenote i thought that last years VW ad where the guy was rushing to stop a wedding was one of the most beautiful and well made 30 seconds of film/tv from the whole year.
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am i wrong about this? i could be missing something, or maybe i've just got their back because they're my friends and I'm driving their tour bus again at the end of the month, but i doubt it. anyway let me know what you think.